500 Words a Week - How Do We Measure Progress?

In the quest to grow into a better version of ourselves, it’s easy to lose sight of what progress actually looks like. We might be working to overcome self-defeating thoughts or move past patterns of thinking and acting that no longer serve us. These are all grand, and often challenging endeavours, but the reality is, we may never fully move past them. For we are always in a state of becoming. The moment we think we’ve arrived, we’ve lost touch with that. We’re not finished products. We are all glorious works in progress.

If there’s no final destination, how do we know if we’re actually making progress?

This is a question I’ve been thinking about lately. Especially when it comes to the more persistent self-limiting beliefs we carry with us. And the reflection I keep coming back to with the help of a friend, is that hopefully with each trip around the sun, perhaps the time we spend stuck in those beliefs begins to shrink. Our ability to notice when our mind slips into these less savoury thoughts improves. We are able to call ourselves out. To question whether what we are thinking is truly helping us or not.

In this way we can notice ourselves progressing. We’re no longer fueling the fire of our own self doubt. We’re turning toward it with curiosity. We begin to take responsibility for the role we play in how we feel.

We begin to see that we’re actually taking steps forward, rather than viewing the process of growth as an insurmountable task ahead of us.

So can we look to become more aware of when we find ourselves slipping into these thoughts and beliefs? Can we turn towards them with curiosity? This is how we move forward. Not by leaping past every limiting thought forever, but by learning to soften their grip when they arise. By seeing them as passing clouds rather than permanent fixtures. And when we don’t cling to them or resist them, when we don’t judge ourselves for having them, they often drift away on their own.

But when we grasp at these emotions or thoughts. When we add more suffering, shame and doubt onto ourselves for simply feeling them. We multiply these clouds until it blocks out the calm blue sky that was always behind it.

Progress isn’t about magically arriving at some imagined place where everything is ok and we are perfectly content, no longer weighed down by the shackles of our old thoughts. It’s much smaller and harder to notice. But the improvements in our quality of life can be profound. We just have to learn to notice them.

Because these small signs of progress, the quicker recoveries, the increased self-awareness, the softened responses, are what keep us showing up. Today, tomorrow, and the next.